Life, Loss

Brei: God healed me!

Brei God healed me!

Pao carried Brei and placed her on our bed. She was wearing white sando and Pampers. He was crying and crying and he repeatedly asked God to bring her back to life, until he fell asleep beside our dear firstborn who passed away hours after I gave birth to her. When he woke up, he was so stunned that Brei was in a different position, and even more so when she opened her eyes and said, “Daddy!”

“God healed me,” Berea said. And they finally had the chance to hug each other. All this happened while I was downstairs, until I heard Pao calling my name and asking me to go up. I felt alarmed because we always just calmly call each other’s name so that we won’t feel like there’s any emergency when there’s none. I was ready to run to the room to see what the “emergency” was, but they were already downstairs. Pao was carrying our dear daughter. From her father’s arms, Berea Dannielle turned her beautiful face and ran towards me to embrace me, and with the sweetest voice I’ve ever heard, she called me, “Mommy!” And then Pao woke up and told me everything about what happened.

I have asked God a couple of times if I could dream about Brei and just a few nights ago, Pao dreamt this dream. “Ang daya,” I said! But we always go back to God’s written word. I know that God can speak through dreams but I also know that the desires of our hearts can fuel our dreams. So whether I dream about Brei or not, I know that she is in heaven (2 Samuel 12:23), a place where there is no more crying or pain (Revelation 21:4), and that really, God has “healed” her by transforming her earthly body to a glorious one (Philippians 3:21). Oh, and yes, I will see her again for sure (Romans 10:9-10)!

I am the author of the book, When God Could’ve But He Didn’t. I am the happy wife of my happy husband, Pao, both of us happily hoping for at least two more children.


About Pam Marasigan

Hello! I'm a wife and mom who has a full-time job and does homeschooling, and I also birthed a book a year after we lost our firstborn. I aspire to live each day according to God’s purpose for me. I believe that we were designed to live life to the full throughout life’s different seasons.